How to be Smarter: People love to tell others their life should be more structured. But if you take everything out of a messy drawer and attempt to put it back in neatly, sometimes not all of it will fit. Just because someone tells you your drawers–or your life–should be more organized and linear, doesn’t mean that is the best way for the things you find important to fit together.

How to be Prettier: You can wear black and navy at the same time as long as it looks deliberate. Have the black be a true black, and the navy be an obvious navy. If the colors are too close together (i.e. a faded black top with a deep navy pair of pants), the look will appear sloppy and unplanned.

How to be (less) Awkward: Offbeat images/graphs/photos from the web.

PS: Check out the feature on SP&A today on A Vigilant Muse!

How to be Smarter: Sometimes the people that you think you need the most, might actually need you more back.

How to be Prettier: Beautiful, beautiful fall boots. Just the ones I’ve been looking for.

How to be (less) Awkward: To make your next party more fun.

How to be Smarter: If you can’t make time for other people, like your friends or your parents, when everything in your life is going great, don’t expect them to make time for you when things in your life are going poorly.

How to be Prettier: Girly but not overly expensive office supplies. (I just ordered these fun pencils for a friend who recently started a new job).

How to be (less) Awkward: This is an endearingly cute thing to do to a friend/significant other/crush on a coffee date.

How to be Smarter: If your significant other is not meeting your expectations, you need to either change your expectations or change your significant other. If the issue is small, change your expectations. If the issue is large, change your significant other. And the way to decide if an issue is small or large is to figure out how important the issue is to you. The more important the issue is to you, the bigger it is.  

How to be Prettier: Just the cutest little things for your feet to snuggle in as we roll into fall nights. Also the perfect thing to buy for a friend going through a rough time, or to mail in a care package to someone you love that is far-away.

How to be (less) Awkward: In an elevator, women exit first, and age take priority. For example, if you and your boyfriend are in an elevator, you get off first. If you and your mom are in the elevator, your mom exits first. If you, your boyfriend, and your mom are in the elevator, your mom exits, then you, then your boyfriend. If you, your boyfriend, your dad, and your mom are in the elevator,  your mom exits, then you, then your dad, then your boyfriend.

How to be Smarter: People that give “it’s too hard” as an excuse for not going after their dreams are not worthy of what they want in the first place.

How to be Prettier: To preserve items while washing them, make sure you close all the buttons/snaps and turn the clothes inside out. This will keep fewer buttons from falling off, and help the item to fade less.

How to be (less) Awkward: Offbeat paintings of the U.S.’s leader.

PS: Happy birthday, Kelly! Your friend Kasia emailed me to wish you a happy birthday on the blog because she knows you enjoy reading Smart Pretty and Awkward, and wanted you to know you “deserve a lovely birthday!” She writes, “I could tell you about her prestigious internship or her success in the classroom, but it’s Kelly’s big heart that make her a wonderful friend.”

How to be Smarter: There are two kinds of emails you can get: the ones you read, and the ones you delete. There are two kinds of people you can be: a person who people want to pay attention to, and a person people find irrelevant. Don’t let yourself become spam in someone else’s life: stay interesting, relevant, and compelling to those you love.

How to be Prettier: Being a trendsetter, a Vogue reader or a daring dresser is not for everyone. Some people don’t follow fashion–and that is fine. You don’t have to be fashion-forward; it’s okay to just be fashion-friendly. Fashion-friendly is about enjoying shopping for pieces you like that flatter your body. If you don’t have the time or interest in being fashion-forward, don’t let anyone make you feel like that’s a bad thing.

How to be (less) Awkward: A very smartly-written television series I highly recommend watching about feel out-of-place and fitting in: Freaks and Geeks. One of my favorite shows of all-time.

How to be Smarter: In life, younger women are always watching you, and you have a responsibility to be a good role model. In sororities, when the seniors stand up in meetings and the freshmen watch the older girls’ every move; in families, when the older ones’ choices are admired by the younger sisters and cousins; in jobs, where the female boss’ way she carries herself is emulated by the less-experienced staff members. You have a responsibility to act intelligently and make positive choices, not only for yourself but also for those that are looking up to you.

How to be Prettier: I love the unexpectedness of a gray moccasin, paired with a loose plaid shirt and distressed skinny jeans.

How to be (less) Awkward: If you’re talking with someone and the phone cuts out, when you are re-connected to them there is no need to play the blame game of whose phone cut out. Just pick up the conversation where it left off–skip the “was that your phone?” or “why did you drop out on me?” I’m sure it was just an accident; keep the conversation moving.

How to be Smarter: The less often people ask for help from you, the more you should pay attention when they actually do.

How to be Prettier: The happiest people I know, dress happy. And dressing joyfully, for most people, doesn’t mean black. I don’t believe that people wear black because they like it–I believe they wear black because they think it makes them look slimmer, or because they believe they will blend in better, or because they are under the impression wearing colors other than black is more work. I don’t think any of those are always true. Dress happy–wear color.

How to be (less) Awkward: How to be Alone: A How-To Video.  I really like this.

How to be Smarter: Coffee’s benefits.

How to be Prettier: Cute line of leopard heart jewelry from Betsey Johnson: earrings, necklaces, and bracelets. A nice way to incorporate the fall leopard trend into your wardrobe without feeling super-flashy.

How to be (less) Awkward: Please don’t wear shoes like this.

How to be Smarter: “Going for your dreams” is not an activity you can do once and then check off the box. It involves taking risks, making decisions, working hard, trying again, and not giving up, day in and day out, over and over and over again, until your dream is realized. You must “go for it” every day, every hour, every moment, until what you are waiting for happens.

How to be Prettier: You should be remembering to wear SPF everyday to prevent skin damage, but when flying, be extra sure to wear SPF–the closer you are to the sun, the more intense the solar rays are (Source).

How to be (less) Awkward: Swearing isn’t that attractive anytime, but swearing looks downright crass in emails, when the text of the message is right there in black and white, saved forever.

How to be Smarter: If someone gives you a contact and you reach out to that contact and something good happens, you must follow up with the connector and let them know the outcome. The connector will feel good knowing you took their advice, and you will not come off as rude for taking advantage of their help and not following back up with them.

How to be Prettier: For an updated spin on the locket, I used this site to submit a picture of someone I love, had them laser the image onto a tiny gold charm, and then strung it on a thin gold chain to hang around my neck.

How to be (less) Awkward: On trains and buses, I like it when people ask to sit next to me. I always say yes, but the fact that they ask makes me like them a whole lot more. I imagine this is the same for most other people, too.

How to be Smarter: Boys that care always wait at the station with you, and then watch until you get safely on and the bus or train rolls away.

How to be Prettier: Everyone should feel comfortable in their undergarments.

How to be (less) Awkward: Treat all your friends so each one secretly believes they are your favorite. This is also applicable for raising children.

How to be Smarter: People that get their feathers ruffled over unimportant things rarely learn how to fly.

How to be Prettier: The most ideal cape coat for fall, in the best fall colors: navy and camel. If you see a girl running around NYC wearing it, it’s me.

How to be (less) Awkward: Levels of Social Entrapment (great blog in general).

How to be Smarter: People that hold themselves to high standards tend to make better friends and romantic partners than people full of excuses.

How to be Prettier: To the casual observer (which almost all boys and most girls are), the  difference in appearance in someone wearing five inch heels vs. someone wearing 3 inch heels is small. There is really no need to tower around in impossibility high heels if a shorter heel would make you much more comfortable.

How to be (less) Awkward: I spent an awfully long time browsing this zany retail site last night.