How to be Smarter: To become better at something, whether it’s a skill or a character trait, simply: 1. do it over and over and over again and 2. be open to hearing suggestions on how you could improve. Nobody ever got worse at something by practicing and asking someone trusted for feedback on their performance.

How to be Prettier: When video-chatting or Skyping with far-away friends and family, putting on “stage makeup”–slightly brighter lips and cheeks–helps to keep from looking too washed out “on-camera.” (Even if there is only one other person seeing you!)

How to be (less) Awkward: A positive, fun site: Daily Pep Talk From a Best Friend.

How to be Smarter: I read this blog post about word usage a week ago, and it really touched me.

How to be Prettier: If there is a beauty product you are constantly forgetting, like sunscreen or wrinkle cream, put the container next to your toothbrush (or another item on the bathroom counter you use each day). Just having the forgotten product in plain sight makes it more likely to become a regular part of your beauty routine.

How to be (less) Awkward: How to be more interesting in ten steps (I really like the graphics).

How to be Smarter: If you always make mountains out of molehills, the only thing people will trust you to manage is molehills.

How to be Prettier: I’m really trying to take shorter showers, as it dries out my skin less in the winter and is better for the environment. Getting a shower clock has been the most helpful thing I’ve done to reach that goal — it’s much harder to lose track of time with a clock actually in the shower.

How to be (less) Awkward: If I get a text message that makes me smile, I take a screenshot of it on my iPhone. Later when I’m bored and flipping through my iPhone photos, seeing the text screenshot usually makes me smile all over again.

P.S. My half of a Flash Friday on Family Relationships in Your 20’s is up over at 40:20 Vision.

How to be Smarter: The problem isn’t a lack of good ideas, it’s not remembering your good ideas. I bet if for one week–maybe one day–you wrote down each and every idea that came into your head, without pre-censoring out the “bad ones,” you would have a pretty interesting list of activities to do, businesses to start, majors to consider, places to visit, people to email, and topics to research by the end of the week.

How to be Prettier: An SP&A Exclusive Discount Code: With the promo code SMARTER, you can get 30% off a single regular priced item and free standard shipping at Francesca’s Collections, valid until 1/30. (Disclaimer: Online only. Cannot be combined with other discounts or promo codes. One time use. Gift cards & sale items are excluded).

How to be (less) Awkward:  During phone interviews, where you cannot see the body language of the interviewer, wait a half-second before starting to answer a question. Sometimes people ask questions and then keep talking, and if both you and interviewer begin talking at the same time, it can be awkward to figure out who should keep going.

How to be Smarter: When moving, set aside a screwdriver to put at the top of one of the boxes. It will probably be one of the first things you need in your new house, and you don’t want to dig through a bunch of boxes to find it.

How to be Prettier: If you are heading out on New Year’s Eve, wear your warmest coat (you will coat check it two seconds after you get into the venue anyways), and shoes you have broken-in already. A warm coat and feet that don’t pinch eliminate 99% percent of New Year’s Eve going-out hassles.

How to be (less) Awkward: It’s totally fine if you are not in the mood to go out and would rather stay home for the night. But if you make a choice to go out for the evening, you have also made a choice to leave any bad attitude at home. It’s better to be the girl that everyone misses and wishes was at the party, then the girl at the party complaining about how she would rather be at home.

How to be Smarter: In general, there are two reasons for why you should be doing something: either doing it brings you joy, or doing it puts you on a path that will get you closer to your final goal. If something doesn’t fulfill either of these two purposes, it might be time to stop doing it.

How to be Prettier: My favorite deep conditioner.

How to be (less) Awkward: An offbeat but surprisingly useful gift for a friend moving into a new place is a big box of double A batteries. Everyone always needs batteries, but it’s something we rarely think to buy for ourselves until whatever device we want to use runs out of them. Buying a friend a big box ensures she’ll be stocked up for a while in her new place.

How to be Smarter: The best thing you can do for your own happiness level is to engage in the job that you do. Ask questions, think strategically, and befriend co-workers. These will all help you in your career path, but, perhaps more importantly, they will help you enjoy the place you spend 8 hours a day. And enjoying where you spend the majority of your day can make your whole life better.

How to be Prettier: Great video on blow-drying bangs.

How to be (less) Awkward: Don’t worry about who is prettier than you. You can’t control that anyways. Worry about whose more interesting than you. Because working to make your own life more interesting is the best remedy to jealousy, and in the process your whole world becomes more enjoyable–for you.

How to be Smarter: When something sweet spills and you don’t take the time to wipe it up right away, the sugar hardens and bugs are drawn to it. The same way, when someone in a relationship stops being sweet and you don’t take the time to talk about the issue right away, the problem only gets harder to fix and as time passes, sadness and mean words are drawn to the spot the sweetness used to be.

How to be Prettier: Right now, the stores have lots of options for festive little red dresses, meant for Christmas parties. But next week, when the holiday stuff goes on sale, it will be a great time to find an (inexpensive) red dress that you can tuck in your closet and pull out for a Valentine’s Day date.

How to be (less) Awkward: If riding backwards on a train doesn’t bother you, sitting that way can lessen the chance someone will sit next to you because most people don’t voluntarily choose to ride backwards.

How to be Smarter: Timing is important when approaching someone about a sensitive issue. When you are about to have a serious discussion with someone, chose a time of day when they are not already stressed out and are not busy multitasking.

How to be Prettier:  Use your ring finger to apply under-eye concealer; it is one of your weakest fingers and will tug at your skin less, which is better for wrinkle prevention.

How to be (less) Awkward: Not awkward, just adorable: feel-good blog of wedding proposals.

How to be Smarter: Trust is a relationship is equal parts trusting the other person, and being trustworthy yourself.

How to be Prettier: A fashion/lifestyle blog I really enjoy: Adored Austin.

How to be (less) Awkward: If you are invited to attend a concert of a band you are unfamiliar with, before the show take the time to Wikipedia the band and listen to a couple of their songs on YouTube. Having at least some baseline familiarly with the band and their albums shows your date you appreciate the ticket, and you will probably enjoy the concert more yourself if you know the band’s hits.

How to be Smarter: Great article on effective non-creepy ways to use LinkedIn.

How to be Prettier: I’m really loving grey nail polish this season–quirky enough to be different, neutral enough to wear to work, and on-trend.

How to be (less) Awkward: Before a plane trip, ask a friend or a crush to suggest a song to add to your iPod–and then don’t allow yourself to listen to the song until on the plane. It’s just a small thing, but listening to a song someone else has suggested gives you both something to look forward to on the plane (when you are sans Internet access), and something to take your mind off flying if you’re a nervous flyer.

How to be Smarter: If someone tells you that you can never do better than them, that’s the first clue that you can.

How to be Prettier: An accessory usually gets more wear than a piece of clothing; if you want to splurge on something designer, you will most likely use a designer wallet, shoes or bag more often than a designer dress or top.

How to be (less) Awkward: The Importance of Hobbies [with Christina from 40:20 Vision].

Today Smart Pretty and Awkward turns 3 years old. Writing this blog is one of the most interesting, fun, life-changing things that’s ever happened to me, and I have each one of you to thank for that.

Your support has been instrumental in making so many of my dreams for this blog come true. If there is ever anything I can do to help make something you are working on a success, please don’t hesitate to reach out: molly@smartprettyandawkward.com

Additionally, as a thank you, 3 comments left on this post will be selected using random.org to win one item of their choice from SP&A’s merch store. To be eligible to win, simply comment before Sunday, December 4 at 11:59 pm ET. I’ll email the winners on Monday.

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Here are some especially fun things that have happened in the past year:

-Appearing on the morning show Great Day St. Louis 

-Guest posting on Allstate’s Good Hands Community

-Speaking at the 20SB Conference in Chicago and the Indie Biz Chicks Conference

-Curating online boutiques for Loving Eco and GS Lillian

-Launching Coffee with Molly (which wildly exceeded my expectations, thank you)

-Writing a regular Flash Friday column with Christina of 40:20 Vision

-Being interviewed by Lulu’s, Tri Sigma’s National Blog, and Fashionably Marketing

-Being featured in Francesca’s Collections’ Bloggers We Love

-Launching a SP&A Tumblr

-Crossing 10,000 fans on Facebook

-Being mentioned in InstyleUK and Redbook Mag

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xoxo,

Molly

P.S. Here are Year One and Year Two anniversary posts.

How to be Smarter: You don’t make polite small talk with other people just to make their day better. You do it because it makes both your days better. Humans need other humans, and even just sharing a quick exchange about the song playing on the radio with the secretary at the dentist’s office can make the interaction or the wait time more enjoyable for everyone.

How to be Prettier: The width of a scarf is as important as its length; thin scarves look dramatically different around your neck than wider scarves.

How to be (less) Awkward: Pretty much everything that seemed miserable to me five years ago is now my best material for jokes. So when things look bad or you screwed something up, imagine how in a few years (or months, or weeks, or even minutes) it will be just another funny story you can tell on first dates and mass-text to your girlfriends.

How to be Smarter: Even when the day just seems average, or maybe even a little bad, I like to remind myself that the next email, or phone call, or encounter I have, could come with the best news ever. We all can be perpetually on the edge of the best day of our life, and not even know it.

How to be Prettier: When giving a speech, put a smiley face in the upper corner of each notecard to remind yourself to smile while you talk.

How to be (less) Awkward: I always think you should go where people want you. If you are at a party, and no one in the circle you are standing in seems interested in hearing what you have to say, move to another circle. Same goes for jobs and relationships.

Hope you have a million and one reasons to be thankful.

Love,

Molly

How to be Smarter: It’s important to look at someone’s intentions before getting annoyed or angry. If someone’s intentions were kind but misguided, that deserves a different reaction than someone whose intentions were mean-spirited.

How to be Prettier: A trim means different things to different stylists. Instead of asking for a trim, ask for a specific measurement in inches (or a specific fraction of an inch) cut off.

How to be (less) Awkward: Not awkward, just awesome: a retro photography art project.

How to be Smarter: A step everyday eventually equals a mile. If you can do one thing that will get you closer to your goal each day–just one thing–you will reach the goal. It might take seven days or it might take 70, but you will get there eventually if you keep stepping.

How to be Prettier: If you are eating a microwave dinner, take it out of the container and eat it on a pretty plate. It makes the whole meal look more appealing.

How to be (less) Awkward: When at a business lunch, after you finish eating try nonchalantly swishing water in your mouth. Business colleagues might not feel comfortable telling you when you have food in your teeth, and it looks silly to have a bit of food in the middle of your front teeth when pitching your company.

How to be Smarter: 25 Worst Passwords of 2011 (and how to create a better one).

How to be Prettier: Getting your hair blown-out by a professional before a job interview can help you feel more confident in the interview. (And your hair will still look great when you go out later to celebrate your successful interview).

How to be (less) Awkward: At a party before you head up to the bar to get a drink, ask those around you if they need anything–another drink (alcoholic or not), a napkin, glass of water, etc.